Does it help to talk through mixed feelings before therapy?
It may help. In a 2009 trial of 76 adults with generalized anxiety, people who spent four sessions exploring their mixed feelings about change before starting CBT did more of their between-session practice and had more treatment responders. The gains were clearest when worry was severe, and the authors called the trial preliminary.
What does this mean for you?
Most people come to therapy with two minds about change. Part of you wants things to be different. Another part is tired, wary, or attached to how things are. That push and pull is called ambivalence, and it is normal. This trial asked a simple question: does it help to talk that through before the skills work begins?
For the people in this study, it seemed to. The group that started with four sessions on their mixed feelings did more of the practice their CBT therapist assigned between sessions. That matters, because CBT asks people to try new things in daily life, not just in the room. The extra practice was part of why their worry dropped further.
The conversation itself was not a lecture or a pep talk. Motivational interviewing works by listening. A therapist helps you say out loud what you want, what worries you about changing, and what matters to you. The aim is for your own reasons to become clearer, so the work that follows feels like your choice.
The clearest benefit showed up for people whose worry was most severe at the start. For people with milder worry, the two groups ended up closer together. So this is not a rule that everyone needs a warm up. It is a signal that when change feels heavy or stuck, making room for the mixed feelings first may be worth it.
Be careful about reading too far. This was one small trial with 76 people, focused on generalized anxiety, and the authors called it preliminary. The high worry group showed some slipping at 6 months before doing better again at 12 months. Therapists rated homework higher in the MI group, but the patients' own ratings did not differ. A single study like this points in a direction. It does not settle the question.
What you can take from it is practical. If you notice that part of you does not want to change, you do not have to hide it from your therapist. Saying it out loud is part of the work, and it may make the practice between sessions easier to do.
The takeaway
- Mixed feelings about change are normal. You can bring them to your first sessions instead of hiding them.
- In this trial, talking them through first went with more practice between sessions and more people responding to CBT.
- The evidence is early and came from one small study, so treat it as a useful idea to raise with your therapist, not a rule.
This is the work Asendar™ was built for: helping you notice how you are really feeling about the work between sessions, mixed feelings included, so you and your therapist can see them clearly. It sits alongside your care and supports the plan you set together, rather than replacing it.
Take your Mental Readiness Score