Intention

Should I know what I want to change before starting therapy?

Short answer

Not necessarily. It helps to have a rough sense of direction, but you do not need it all figured out first. A leading researcher argued the tidy stages of change model, which says you must reach a ready to act stage before you begin, does not hold up. Uncertainty is a normal place to start.

The research
West, R. (2005). Time for a change: putting the Transtheoretical (Stages of Change) Model to rest. Addiction, volume 100, pages 1036 to 1039.
Sample None. This is a critical editorial, not a study of participants. It weighs decades of research, most of it on smoking, where the model was built.
Published 2005
Journal Addiction
In 2005, the addiction researcher Robert West wrote a short, pointed editorial in the journal Addiction. His target was the transtheoretical model, better known as the stages of change. That model sorts people into steps, from not yet thinking about change, to thinking about it, to getting ready, to acting, to keeping it up. It became one of the most widely taught ideas in health care. West argued it should be set aside. His main objection was the idea of a stage itself. The model splits a smooth, shifting thing into boxes, and the lines between the boxes are drawn at arbitrary places, often by a clock. Planning to change in the next thirty days puts you in one stage, the next six months in another, with nothing real marking the border. He also pointed out that people in the grip of an addiction rarely hold the steady, coherent plans the model assumes. Change is often sudden and unplanned rather than a march through neat steps. And after decades of study, mostly in smoking, he found little evidence that matching help to a person's stage worked better than help that ignored stages. His suggestion was plain. Go back to simpler questions, how much a person wants to change and how able they feel to do it, or build a better model.
Read the paper

What does this mean for you?

One honest note up front. West was writing about how people change habits like smoking, not about the first day of therapy. So read this as a caution about a popular idea, not as direct proof about your own start. What carries over is the idea he was questioning: that you should move through neat stages of readiness, and know exactly what you want to change, before you are allowed to begin.

That idea shows up everywhere, and it can quietly make people wait. If you believe you need to arrive certain, with the problem named and a plan in hand, then not being sure can feel like a reason to hold off. West's argument loosens that grip. The stages are not the fixed staircase they are often drawn as. Real change is messier than that, and it often starts before anyone feels fully ready.

So the honest answer to the question is gentle. A rough sense of what is bothering you helps, and naming even one thing gives the work a place to start. But you do not need the whole map. Therapy is partly how you find out what you want to change. Coming in unsure is not a failure of preparation. It is a common and workable place to begin, and a good clinician expects it.

The takeaway

Terms in this page

This is the work Asendar™ was built for: helping you put words to what feels unclear, so you can walk in with a starting point instead of waiting to feel ready. If you want a simple read on where you are today, take your Mental Readiness Score.

Take your Mental Readiness Score

Explore more in the Intention pillar